Ok, so apparently being alone on a small island in Greece for two weeks can actually be a little lonely. It’s almost as if being able to communicate with people in person is important to mental health or something. Right.
However, I have an alternative reading of my feelings of loneliness. What is actually going on is that I am being pushed to manage my time wisely and do all of the things that I think I want to do in an efficient way and that happens to be vaguely challenging. I’m feeling lonely because I can’t blame other people for interference or my lack of focus.
And maybe this sounds a little strange, but I this thinking to be a good step. I hit the wall a little bit yesterday and the day before — feeling frustrated and letting myself engage unhealthier activities as a distraction from all of the healthy activities that are more challenging (playing solitaire on my phone and watching like four episodes of a TV show that really isn’t, um, quality). But now I have the opportunity to acknowledge these as tactics of delay, maybe even coping mechanisms for feeling overwhelmed by my own sets of goals, and I can put them aside and refocus — because I still have a little over a week to master nirvana. Right? Right.
Not that watching an episode of less-than-quality television on occasion is deeply destructive to humanity. But maybe compulsively watching four is less impressive.
So. It has been decided. I am getting up early tomorrow. Watch out, people. Super productive wild woman is making her entrance.