A Postcard at Charis Books, discovered 2009

Each Girl, Each Boy

(Translated from Spanish)

For every girl tired of acting weak
When she is strong, there is a boy
Tired of appearing strong when he feels
Vulnerable./ For every boy sick of the
constant expectation that he know
everything, there is a girl tired that
people don’t trust her intelligence./ For
every girl who is tired of being considered
super sensitive, there is a boy who is
afraid to be gentle and cry./ For every
boy whose sole mechanism for demonstrating
masculinity is competition, there is a
girl accused of not being feminine because
she competes./ For every girl who throws
away her baby doll, there is a boy
who wishes he could find one./ For Every
boy struggling because advertising does not
correspond with his hopes and desires, there
is a girl whose self-esteem is being attacked
by advertisers./ For every girl who takes
a step toward her liberation, there is a boy
who finds an easier path to freedom.

Each Boy, Each Girl

“Girls” on HBO

I think I am supposed to like “Girls.”

But I don’t.

Lena Dunham is witty and insightful. Her perspective is fresh. “Girls” is the “Sex in the City” of my generation, with a slightly pornographic bent. And yet…

It’s so painful to watch. I don’t like the characters. I can’t relate to their whininess and complete inability to recognize their own projections. Part of me feels sorry for them, which contributes to the agony I feel when I watch Marnie and Hannah scream back and forth at each other that the other is a bad friend, etc., etc. But mostly my skin is crawling because they are an ugly combination of pathetic, unkind, and unreflective, which ultimately makes it difficult to empathize when they wreak havoc on their own lives. Which is precisely what they do.

Maybe it’s real. Maybe it’s a reflection of reality that I’m uncomfortable with because I recognize it. On the other hand, maybe it’s a reflection of a reality that isn’t accurate among my group of friends who are similarly 24-year-olds figuring out how to be adults in various cities around the world. Yes, it is sometimes tongue-in-cheek — like when Hannah declares that it’s unfair another girl’s boyfriend committed suicide in a horrific way because Hannah would actually like something similar to happen to her so that she can write about it and become famous. Unfortunately, it’s not tongue-in-cheek enough. Hannah is not self-aware enough or self-critical enough, no matter what she might claim.

And more unfortunately, though she is a mirror of some part of my generation, she is a carnival mirror that stretches and magnifies in a most unflattering way.

Sometimes a writer’s job is to capture truths and project them more clearly. Probably Lena Dunham is doing this and it is effectively making me uncomfortable. Kudos. But I also think she hasn’t quite grasped the truth and that the made-for-tv aspect of her work is undermining what would otherwise be an effective criticism of herself and her peers. If it were funnier, I would be more convinced that the script is self-aware, but the funniness of it usually escapes me. Except when I think “Wow that could have been really funny but it just made me feel so awkward.” That she stars in most of her own work puzzles me. Is it self-obsession? Is it a belief that her artwork would be ruined in the body of another actor? Is it a desire to break stereotypes about feminine insecurities? I want to know whether she actually identifies with the character she plays and how much of the life she inhabits is autobiographical because I have a creeping sensation that it is closer to her experience than we think and that maybe, just maybe, she realizes she was so deeply self-centered and self-destructive. Or maybe she doesn’t realize it and “Girls” is the excuse for being a jerk because, look! now she’s famous.

Anyway, the latter part is speculation. Having sat alongside the “types” that she is exaggerating, I think I get it. But who knows.

At the end of the day, Lena Dunham is still smart and talented. She’s still incredibly young and successful, and I’m still impressed if simultaneously disappointed.

I’m not watching anymore “Girls,” but I’ll watch out for whatever’s next.

Keepin it, uh, real… like I do

Just thought that people should know the combination of lyrical geniuses that are currently invading my psyche. I promise the juxtaposition is at least odd if not funny. I credit two rather distinctive friends for confusing my listening habits.

Oh and another thing.

I still need ten more pounds for Oxfam to reach my goal. And that half marathon is one week from tomorrow. So click here and support an excellent cause. K great thanks.

For your trouble, here’s a picture of me running up a bridge in Venice: (I promise that I don’t generally flail my arms out quite so much)

RUNNING!