I just spent the last hour sitting in Northpoint Cafe with my friend B (I interrupted him from doing real work) and we talked about all sorts of lovely things including literature and the meaning of gossip. B says he’s not well-read, but it’s not true because he knows more about everything than I do. I really hope this means he is well-read. Otherwise things are not looking good for me.
Today the sun set at 16:28 and so by the time we were done having coffee it was dark and cold outside and I walked him to the building where he has a seminar and on the way back I considered all of the terrible things that can happen in the dark and I also thought about how much I enjoy walking at night when I am not preoccupied with potential terrible things. Unfortunately, my imagination is excessively dramatic and insistent that every passing car might be about to stop and drag me inside, and that all people, including even elderly men and middle-aged women, are actually going to attack me on the street and that I will have to fight for me life. I have watched a couple of Buffy the Vampire Slayer episodes recently , so many of these scenes include biting and strange changes to my opponent’s facial features. And yes, I am absolutely thinking of elderly men as opponents.
Maybe the only people who do not put my nerves on edge are those carrying small children in strollers or arms. The rest of you are terrifying.
Not to worry, I plan to face my fears by walking frequently in the dark. Because otherwise I would have to be inside by 3:30 every day.
Just don’t yell boo if you see me.
Or, like, grab me from behind. Because I will hit you. Ask my academic Dad; I may not have a knockout punch, but I can take a beating before I will give up. And let’s be honest, even after I realize I know you, I will continue to hit you for scaring me on purpose. But not in the face or stomach because that’s mean.
People Who Are Cute and Not Scary
